Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel
by GeniaTheParadox
Summary: AU Klaine. In which Kurt is the Head Cheerio/HBIC looking for something new, and Blaine is the awkward new kid he has his eyes on.
1. Chapter 1

I've had this AU idea in my head for ages, so I've finally gotten round to writing it. First I was writing it as one big clump of story, but since I have no idea how this is going to end I thought I'd turn it into chapters.

But yeah, chuck some reviews at me, Humble Readers :)

And I don't own Glee. I'm just messing with it.

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><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel<strong>

As captain of a champion cheerleading squad, senior class president and star of an award-winning Glee Club, I basically run this crappy little school. My word is law and I always get what I want. Nobody says no to Kurt Hummel.

Whenever I happen to be feeling a little lonely, guys are pretty much kicking each other out of the way to get with me, and rightly so. I'm the hottest guy at this school, possibly even in this entire shit-heap of a town. That's not even me being an egomaniac, that's just a fact. Your sexuality is invalid. If you've ever looked at me for more than three seconds, chances are you've thought about having sex with me. It's just human nature, and I honestly don't blame you for wanting all up on this. If I were you, I'd want to fuck me too.

But lately I'd been getting kind of bored. Jocks were nice, but it was getting a little samey. Obviously as Head Cheerio I was expected to only ever date the big, strappy football players, but they were all either excruciatingly stupid, so far in the closet they were in Narnia, or a terrible combination of the two. I needed someone on my level, someone who I could actually have a conversation with, someone who wasn't just into me because I look all kinds of crazy sexy in my Cheerios uniform, someone who wouldn't just stare blankly at me whenever I talked about fashion or Broadway and, most importantly, someone who would let me top without freaking out about being 'less of a man'. But apparently this person just didn't exist at McKinley High, so I was stuck fooling around with the jocks and the closet cases forever. Or so I thought.

I saw him on a warm Monday morning as I was walking towards school, Santana and Brittany flanking me like hot cheerleader versions of Crabbe and Goyle. As I glanced across the parking lot I noticed a guy I didn't recognise being cornered by Karofsky and Azimio (both former conquests and pretty average in bed; Azimio didn't last long and Karofsky was far too needy for me). They lifted this new kid off his feet and threw him into the dumpster, guffawing loudly and high-fiving each other as they did. Well that just would not do. I stormed over to them, the girls hot on my heels, and the two guys grinned and puffed out their chests when they saw me. _Please_.

"Hey, Kurt," said Karofsky, arching an eyebrow.

"Turn your flirt off, bear cub," I said with a glare. "This isn't a social call. Get that guy out of the dumpster _now_."

"We were just foolin' around," Azimio chuckled.

"And, as you can see, the girls and I can hardly breathe for laughing," I said sternly. "Now get that guy out of the dumpster and do not make me have to ask you one more time. Do you _want _me to get you expelled again, David?"

"...no," Karofsky said sheepishly.

"Then both of you do as you're fucking told before I _really_ get mad."

Karofsky and Azimio nodded gruffly and got to work pulling the little new kid out of the dumpster. I smiled sweetly at them.

"Thanks, you boys can go back to picking the fleas out of each other ass-crack hair now. Bye!"

The two jocks frowned and lumbered off without a word, I could hear Santana and Brittany gigging behind me, and I was able to get a good look at the new kid as he brushed himself down. He'd totally ODed on hair gel and his outfit made him look like a Baby Gap had recently thrown up on him, but... he was _hot_. Really, he was totally gorgeous, and I don't often say that about guys that are shorter than me.

"Thank you," he mumbled politely, blushing as our eyes met. He had the most amazing eyes.

"Don't mention it, new kid," I said nonchalantly.

"Oh, it's Blaine," he said before me and the girls could leave. "Blaine Anderson. I'm a junior, and I just transferred from..."

"Yeah, I don't care," I interrupted, because jeez, I didn't need his freaking life story. "And I'd rather not use you're actual name until I do, I'm just not there yet. I'd introduce myself but, to be honest, people should know who I am. But welcome to McKinley, short stack. I'm not always going to be here to protect you, so try not to die."

As I walked away I glanced back and saw that he was still staring at me. That wasn't surprising; my ass looked fabulous in these Cheerios track pants. I was definitely up for trying something new now.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed my HBIC Kurt, Humble Readers.<br>I don't know if I have the energy to do Author Notes in all these chapters. Forgive me, fans of my pointless rambling.

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

**Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Two**

I didn't see the new kid again until about a week and a half later. I was in the choir room with my Glee Club, the New Directions (I know that sounds totally wanky, but I didn't pick the name, okay?). The McKinley High Glee Club was at the very bottom of the social heap before I joined and gave it some credibility. Along with my co-captain, Rachel Berry, we'd transformed the failing show choir into social stars, second only to the Cheerios. We'd won Nationals two years in a row now, thanks in no way to our official director, Mr. Schuester. He was running New Directions into the ground until Rachel and I took over. He shows up every now and again to supervise and comes with us to competitions, but we don't let him do anything important. On this particular day he was nowhere to be seen, and Rachel and I were putting together competition set lists that featured us heavily on lead vocal – we were the best performers in the club, after all.

That's when the new kid walked in. He was once against overdoing it with the hair gel, and he once again appeared to be dressed like a Baby Gap mannequin that was allergic to socks, but... _damn_. There was just something about him that was extremely fuckable.

"Can we help you, hobbit?" Santana said with a look of contempt that made me proud.

"Are you lost, new kid?" I said with mock sympathy.

He blushed when he looked at me. His bashfulness was actually kind of adorable.

"I, erm..." he said quietly. "I would like to join your Glee Club... please."

There was muttering and quietly giggling from everyone else in the room.

"You can't just _join_," said Rachel with a pitying chuckle. "We don't let anyone who walks in and asks nicely just join this Glee Club."

"We outlawed that crap after we ended Mr. Schuester's reign of terror," I added.

"We are a champion, award-winning show choir," said Rachel. "We can't just let any old riff-raff in. You have to fill out an application form and you have to audition for us to even _consider_ you."

"Oh, I've already filled out an application," he said with a bright grin, pulling the paper work out of his bag and handing it to Rachel. "And I've prepared an audition song. I have a very musical background, since I was the lead soloist in the show choir at my old school, and..."

"Please stop talking," I said.

He shut up immediately. I admired his obedience. As I turned it over in my head, I supposed it wouldn't be so terrible to have someone new in the Glee Club. All my girls were amazing – Rachel, Santana and Brittany, of course, as well as my number one diva, Mercedes Jones, my sweet Asian Goth, Tina Cohen-Chang, and my beautiful mess, Quinn Fabray. But it would be nice to have a new boy.

With the exception of Artie Abrams, the handicapped director of our school musicals who sang like a dream, the rest of the guys in the club were jocks and, amusingly, former conquests, and they'd all only joined because I had. There was Finn Hudson (four and a half minutes of my life I'm never getting back), Noah Puckerman (awesome, but arrogant), Sam Evans (that absurdly large mouth of his was magical, but he was such a dork) and Mike Chang (a dancer, so deliciously bendy, but not much for conversation). It wouldn't hurt to have a little something new.

"The Dalton Academy Warblers," Rachel read out slowly as she skimmed through his application form. "Why do I know that name...?"

Tina, Mercedes and Quinn all stood behind her and read over her shoulder.

"Oh, I remember them," said Mercedes. "It was that private school we beat at Sectionals one time."

"Oh yeah," said Tina with a nod. "All those cute guys in blazers."

"They were singing Katy Perry or something," Quinn added moodily, curling some of her short pink hair around her finger.

"I think I remember," I said, looking the new kid up and down. "Those uniforms were kind of hot, but I make a habit of not paying too much attention to my competition. Don't take it personally that I don't recognise you, new kid. The Warblers were just a blur of doo-whopping navy blue and red to me at the time."

"...right," the new kid muttered. "So is it okay if I audition now?"

"Sure," I said with a shrug. "I suppose we can give you a shot."

We all sat down, ready to judge, as the new kid handed sheet music to our pianist, Brad, and the rest of the band. He stood awkwardly in front of us in the middle of the room, an embarrassed smile on his face that made him look a little like a nervous toddler.

"So... _Blaine,_" said Rachel, reading his name off of his form. "What will you be singing for us?"

He cleared his throat. "I'll be singing _Something's Coming_ from West Side Story. I've always loved that musical, and I've always dreamed of playing Tony on stage because..."

"Just sing the song," I said because, seriously, we did not need his life story.

He stopped talking and blushed, taking off his bag and cardigan before he nodded at the Brad and the band to start. He shook himself out a little as the music started, but the moment he began to sing he was suddenly the picture of confidence. His dazzling eyes lit up as he moved around the space like he was on a Broadway stage. His voice was dreamy and delicious and possibly even better than the original of this song. It actually made me feel a little... _swoony_. Not a feeling I was used to, but I just couldn't take my eyes off him. He had such amazing presence, such charisma. He was pure leading man material. And his arms in that red polo shirt, not to mention his incredible ass in those tight Capri pants... holy hell, it was pornographic. He didn't even blush when our eyes met. He just gave me this winning smile as he sang, and I actually felt like I was going to evaporate. Nobody had ever had this effect on me before – especially a bashfully little junior who dressed like a baby librarian crossed with a male version of Rachel.

After his big finish – in which I'm pretty sure my heart actually skipped a beat – he was abruptly back to his nervous self, taking an awkward little bow as we applauded. I looked over at the rest of my club to see their reactions. Rachel was clearly in love and the rest of the girls were pretty awestruck too, even Santana, who was a judgemental bitch and man-hating lesbian, so a pretty guy prancing around to West Side Story really shouldn't have done anything to stir her lady-loins. So that was a promising sign. The guys actually looked pretty impressed too, especially Artie, who looked like he really wanted to give a standing ovation. Finn didn't look pleased though, but that was clearly just because he was jealous, and his opinion didn't matter anyway so whatever.

"So, was that, erm... was that okay?" the new kid said anxiously.

Everybody looked at me in expectation.

"We still need time to properly evaluate your audition," I said seriously. "And we need to make sure everything on your application form is in order. But that performance is well above average, Blaine. We'll keep you posted."

He smiled and blushed quite furiously when I used his actual name. "Thank you."

Once he gathered his stuff and exited the choir room, looking back at me as he left, the room was quickly filled with talk about this talented new kid.

"Blaine is amazing," Rachel said, pacing excitedly. "He's an absolute dream. He is the Tony to my Maria."

"He's also obviously gay," Santana said, rolling her eyes. "So put your panties back on, Man Hands."

"How do you know he was gay?" Rachel said, a little desperately. "I didn't really get that impression from him..."

"That's because you have terrible gaydar, Berry," Santana said disdainfully. "He obviously couldn't be any gayer if he tried."

"Obviously," I added, reading through his application form.

"Can we get back on topic please?" Quinn said quietly, frowning at everyone as usual.

"I don't like him," Finn grumbled. "He's such a ball-hog. Total attention seeker."

I didn't even look up from the page. "You're only saying that because he's better than you, Gigantor."

Finn spluttered but couldn't think of a comeback, and I continued to read through Blaine's form as everyone else carried on their discussion. Everything on this form was actually pretty impressive; he could play a bunch of instruments and had watched all of the recommended musicals that Rachel and I had listed – a list that so far only myself and Rachel had actually watched all of. And that audition really had been perfection. There seemed no doubt in my mind that the new kid was going to be a part of my Glee Club regardless of anybody else's opinion. And, as I've said, my word is law.


	3. Chapter 3

**Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Three**

I kept Blaine on tenterhooks all week, just for my own amusement, but when I finally told him that he was going to be part of the New Directions he was over the moon. Seriously, he reacted like he'd won an Oscar or just been told he was going to be father or something. He nearly reached out to hug me but I backed away.

"Calm down, tiny," I said, rolling my eyes. "Just because you're in Glee now doesn't mean we're BFFs."

"Right, of course," he said, his cheeks going red. "Sorry, it's just... I'm really glad that you think I'm good enough. New Directions are legend, and you guys have won Nationals two years in a row..."

"Yes, I know," I said before he could tell me the entire history of my Glee Club. "I'll have Rachel print you out a rehearsal schedule."

Before I could leave, he said "Oh, Kurt, I was wondering if maybe you, erm... you would like to get some coffee with me... if you want."

I looked at him with an arched eyebrow. "You're seriously asking me out?"

"Well... yeah," he said awkwardly. "Class is over, so maybe we can just go to The Lima Bean and..."

"I have Cheerios practice," I said bluntly. "And, even though I'm the only person who's allowed to be late, Coach Sylvester still doesn't approve of tardiness, and she certainly doesn't let anybody skip practice for anything less than serious injury or death."

"Oh," he said sadly, blushing adorably. "Right, yes... sorry."

I paused for a second, just looking at him. He was like a disappointed puppy in a bowtie.

"You can sit in at my practice," I finally said, making his eyes light up. How was he so cute? "And then afterwards you can take me to Breadstix, your treat."

"But I thought we were just going for coffee?"

"Now, Blaine," I said sweetly, although my smirk was probably less sweet. "I thought you were a gentleman? Just getting coffee isn't much of a first date, is it?"

He grinned brightly, like the most excited child, and followed me to the school gym. Coach Sylvester wasn't happy about me bringing someone to practice, but I assured her that he didn't have any recording devices and he wasn't in cahoots any rival squads. I didn't blame her for being suspicious though, since I knew she's never trusted anybody with curls or a fondness for too much hair gel. Blaine went to sit up on the bleachers as I went to limber up with the rest of the squad.

"What's Frodo doing here?" said Santana, as she and Brittany came to stretch beside me.

"He's taking me to dinner after practice," I said.

"Ooh, you guys are going on a date?" said Brittany happily. "That's so cute! Blaine's really pretty, and imaging you guys making out is super hot in my head."

"I didn't think the hobbit would really be your type, Princess," said Santana – she was the only person who was allowed to call me names like that. "The guys you hook up with are usually... bigger."

"And dumber," I said. "And more boring, and less likely to let me top. I'm just trying something a little different."

I looked at Blaine up in the bleachers and gave him a flirty little wave, making him blush and grin as he waved back. Santana arched an eyebrow at me.

"So you're looking for someone to be your bitch?"

"Almost," I said thoughtfully. "I think Blaine will be more like my puppy, which like a bitch only cuter."

"Sounds like fun," Santana said with an approving smirk. "I'd ask if Britts and I could double date so we could watch the carnage, but I don't want to cockblock."

"I appreciate it, Sandbags," I said with a smile. I'd been calling her that since she got a boob job over the summer.

"Okay, ladies, places!" Coach Sylvester yelled into her bullhorn. "This performance has to be better than perfect in time for the pep rally, or so help me God I am breaking out the thumbscrews!"

We all got into position, Santana, Brittany and I putting on our microphones so we could sing. The Cheerios pep rally number was going to be Rihanna's _S&M_, and Coach Sylvester had told us to make it absolutely disgusting in the best way possibly. The choreography was just as filthy as the song, which is why I was glad that Blaine was sitting in on this particular practice. I was obviously singing lead, and it was so much easier to be sexy when it was directed at someone. The music started and the complex cheer routine began. Santana and Brittany were singing my backup, and as I sang the first line – beautifully, of course – I kept my eyes fixed firmly on Blaine.

"_It's so good being bad, ain't no way I'm turning back..."_

The routine contained a lot of hip and ass shaking, quite a bit of pelvic thrusting, and the odd burst of self and mutual spanking, in theme with the song. Santana, Brittany and many of the other girls were basically all over me, pulling at my uniform and bending over in front of me. But I kept my eyes on Blaine as much as I possibly could, aiming every hip shake in his directions, and pretty much having full on, hardcore cheer-sex with him.

"'_Cause I may be bad but I'm perfectly good at it! Sex in the air, I don't care I love the smell of it! Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me!" _

Blaine's eyes were wide, his mouth slightly open. He was only watching me, even though the performance as a whole was pretty spectacular – the dancing and gymnastics were impressively daring. But Blaine only ever watched me, looking like he'd never seen anything so sexy in his life. His face was bright red and he had to cross his legs and cover his lap with his bag when I sang the line _"give it to me strong_." It was all very gratifying. It stroked my ego wonderfully... and hopefully it meant he'd be stroking something else later. Once we finished Blaine actually clapped, even though he was the only person in the audience. Coach Sylvester didn't look happy though.

"Mediocre!" she yelled through her bullhorn. "That was about as sexy as your average eye injury! Some of you should be thanking your lucky stars that corporal punishment was outlawed in public schools in this state, because I have never been so underwhelmed in my entire life! Everybody take a leaf out of Hummel's book, because sweet Porcelain is the only person on this squad who doesn't appear to be actively trying to depress me! Now hit the showers, you sloppy disappointments!"

Everybody groaned and made their way to the locker room, bowing their heads in shame as they walked past the still glaring Coach Sylvester. Blaine rushed down the bleachers to meet me.

"That was really... wow," he gushed. "That was... that was amazing, Kurt. Really, you're incredible."

"I know," I said with a shrug. "Thanks for noticing."

"So, is practice over?" he asked.

I nodded, looking right into his eyes to make him blush. "I'm just going to take a shower and change into something a little more date-worthy. And then I'm _all yours_."

He looked nervously excited, and waited outside the locker room like the dapper little gentleman he was while I got ready. I always had an emergency outfit in my locker on days when I was in my Cheerios uniform, which came in handy on occasions like this. And my ass looked even better in my ungodly tight designer jeans than in my red track pants. Once I was ready and had promised Santana and Brittany that I'd spill all the gory details tomorrow I went back to Blaine, who let out an audible gasp when he saw me.

"Wow, you look... awesome," he said, staring at me. This was the first time he was ever seeing me in something other than my Cheerios uniform.

"I know right," I said. "So shall we go?"

He nodded speechlessly and followed my obediently out to the car park. I was sure it would be easy to get into those Capri pants later. He was already pretty much my puppy.


	4. Chapter 4

**Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Four**

We drove to Breadstix in my car, the journey full of awkward small talk. During the actual dinner he did nothing but ask me questions about myself. I mean, I love talking myself – I'm the most interesting person I know – but it was strange being with someone that seemed so genuinely fascinated by me. It was weird... and nice. Whenever a guy usually took me out to dinner they'd just talk about themselves, or only pretend to listen to me while they obviously undressed me with their eyes. And that's if they'd even take me on a proper date like this – the closet cases didn't like anything that was in public.

So it was really nice being with Blaine, and seeing that he was really _listening_ to me and actually gave a shit about what I said. It sounded vomit-inducing, I know. But he was just so sweet and charming. And even in that bowtie he was hot as hell. But it was a different kind of hotness, a modest hotness, like he honestly didn't have any idea just how gorgeous he was and would probably just think I was being polite if I told him. The bill arrived just as we were discussing our favourite scenes from Funny Girl – it was great being with a guy I had so much in common with – and he gladly paid for our meal like a gentleman and left the waitress a huge tip.

"I had such a great time, Kurt," said Blaine with a massive grin as we walked to my car through the evening breeze.

"Yeah," I said, unable to stop myself from smiling at his cuteness. "I actually had a good time too."

Once we got to my car I held onto his wrist to stop him from opening the door. He looked confused, adorably so, and was even more startled when I pushed him back against my car, pining his arms at his sides.

"W-what are you doing?" he stuttered quietly.

Rather than answer I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his gently, lightly licking his bottom lip until he sighed and opened his mouth for me. He kissed me back slowly and cautiously. He was actually a really awesome kisser, and he tasted like the chocolate desert he'd had earlier. I sucked on his bottom lip, making him whimper, before I finally pulled away. He still had his eyes shut and I could tell that his face was bright red even in the semi-darkness.

"You're totally not my type, Blaine," I whispered, making him open his eyes. "But you're still smoking hot and all kinds of fuckable."

"Erm... thanks?" he said, embarrassed. He clearly didn't believe me.

"You know, the backseat of my car is mighty comfortable," I purred. "And that pretty mouth of yours would look even prettier around my dick."

He spluttered, giggling nervously, and looked everywhere but at me. "Kurt, that's kind of... I mean, don't you think that's a little..."

"There's nothing _little_ about anything I'm talking about, sweetie. Now get that ridiculously sexy ass in the backseat so you can suck me. I might even return the favour if you're good enough."

"Kurt, I... I don't think we should."

I scoffed. "Oh, come on. Don't act like you don't want to know what I taste like, baby. As hot as your bashful schoolboy bit is, I'm getting a little antsy."

"Kurt, no." He started trying to push me away. "I don't want to ruin tonight."

I looked at him like he was crazy, releasing his arms and taking a step back. "And how exactly is a playful blowjob going to ruin tonight?"

"It's only our first date!" he insisted. "I haven't even known you for that long, and I really like you, Kurt. Seriously, you're like, the coolest person I've ever met... the coolest person that's ever spoken to me. You're beautiful and confident and, yes, you're incredibly sexy too. But..." He sighed sadly, speaking quieter. "But sex is a big deal for me. It's important and special, not just some throw-away thing to do in the backseat of a car."

After a pause, where I narrowed my eyes at him, I said "Are you fucking serious? You've obviously wanted in my pants since you first saw me, and yet now you're saying no? _You_ are turning _me_ down?"

"I'm not turning you down, Kurt, not technically," he said quietly. "I really like you, I just said. I just don't want our evening to end like this. I don't want to make it cheap and meaningless. I don't..." He swallowed and looked at his feet. "I don't want my first time to be like this."

Oh my actual God. "You're a virgin? Are you fucking kidding me?"

He didn't say anything. He just frowned and looked at the ground.

"But you're hot," I said incredulously. "Socially awkward and dorkily dressed, but hot all the same. And you went to a private all-boys school. Do you have any idea how many guys I've fooled around with from Dalton? That place is like a beautifully furnished queer-hive. How the hell are you still a virgin?"

"It's not like I've never had the opportunity," he said defensively. "I've dated guys before and everything. I'm just waiting for the right time. I want that first moment of intimacy to be with someone I really care about, someone I'm in love with, and that isn't a bad thing. I don't want to just throw myself around like I don't matter."

"Ugh, you sound like my Dad," I said, disgusted. "I can't believe I wasted my time on a frigid little virgin. Do you know how many guys would willingly sell their Xbox and let their mom see their browser history just for the chance to have sex with me?"

"Kurt, I'm sorry..."

"Whatever," I said, getting into my car. "Have fun with your virginity, dwarf. You can walk home."

I was shaking with anger throughout the entire drive home. I couldn't believe that he'd turned me know. No one had _ever_ turned me down. Nobody says no to Kurt Hummel! And, worst of all, he actually made me feel like a slut. Okay, so I'd had a lot of conquests, but that didn't mean I was easy. I didn't let just _anyone_ up on this, although there'd been plenty that I'd regretted afterwards, mentioning no names (Finn). But Blaine just made me feel... cheap. Ugh, that bastard!

He was still all I could think about once I got home. But as I lay on my bed, staring at me ceiling while Lady Gaga played quietly out of my iPod dock, I wasn't angry anymore. I was... sad. Blaine hadn't _really_ turned me down. He said he really liked me. And all that stuff about not wanting to ruin our date... maybe he was just trying to be gentleman. A frigid and annoying gentleman, but... yeah. I was still offended, but for a lot more reasons now. It had been years since anybody had made me feel bad about myself, and I wasn't entirely sure what to do.


	5. Chapter 5

**Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Five**

I pressed the on button of the microphone, ready to do Monday's morning announcements.

"Good morning, McKinley High," I said brightly. "This is your much loved senior class president, Kurt Hummel, wishing you a tolerable Monday. Here's the news for today. For all you fans of abstinence, guidance counsellor, Ms. Pilsbury, is looking for students to join the Celibacy Club since its last member was forced to leave due to pregnancy. A pristine signup sheet is up on your nearest notice board, and I would like to personally volunteer our new student, Blaine Anderson, who would fit right in.

"In other, more interesting news, me and my two-time National Show Choir Championship winning Glee Club, the New Directions, were pleased, flattered and unsurprised with the outpouring of application forms to join us. Obviously not many of you fit the bill, but for the ones who almost did a call-back list is on your nearest notice board and auditions will be held at your allotted times at the end of the day in the auditorium.

"And finally, I hope you'll all be out in force this Thursday for the pep rally to support our football team as they bravely take on Carmel High during Friday night's game. And, more important, to see myself and my six-time National Cheerleading Championship winning squad, the Cheerios put on a frankly breath-taking show with a routine that's guaranteed to get your hearts a-racing. So don't miss out, Titans. This is senior class president, Kurt Hummel, signing out and wishing you an above average Monday."

That day I managed to successfully avoid Blaine like the plague until just before Glee Club. He walked apprehensively up to me as I fixed my hair, looking at myself in the mirror on my locker door.

"Hey, Kurt," he said quietly.

I glanced at him once, gave him a dirty look, and went back to fixing my hair.

"I wanted to apologise for what happened the other night," he said sincerely. "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. It really wasn't my intention."

I didn't say anything. I just scoffed dismissively.

"I heard you mention my name in the morning announcements," he continued. "I know I should be offended, since you basically told the whole school that I'm frigid. But honestly... I was just happy that you said my name."

I put my comb and hair spray back in my bag, still not looking at him or saying anything. But I felt my stomach do a strange little swoop.

"You said when you first met me – when you saved me from the dumpster – that you didn't plan on using my actual name until you... until you _cared_." I couldn't believe he remembered that. "So it's just really thrilling to know that someone as amazing and talented and popular as you actually cares about me enough to know my name... and agree to go on a date... and get mad at me for saying no. But I guess it's natural for the dorky little new kid to have a hopeless crush on the beautiful head cheerleader, right?"

"You're certainly not the first, and you definitely won't be the last," I finally said, looking at him.

His bowtie and sweater vest made him look like a baby nerd... but he was still annoyingly gorgeous. He blushed, not meeting my eyes.

"You're different though," I said, with an arched eyebrow. "You're not like most guys that crush on me. They're a little more into the instant gratification, the physical side of things. They just think I'm hot, and get all filthy and rigid fantasising about the day that I finally acknowledge their existence. But not you. You think I'm _beautiful_. You want to take me for coffee and _get to know me_. You want sex with me to be _meaningful_..."

"You're saying all this like it's a bad thing," he interrupted, sounding hurt. "Like I'm wasting my time or something."

"To be brutally honest, you kind of are," I said, feeling that sadness and anger all over again. "You're not my type, Blaine. The only reason I even gave you the time of day is because I was bored. I date _jocks_ – big, athletic, muscular, popular jocks. I just felt like something a little different, a nice change. I wanted someone who would maybe let me _top_ occasionally, a pet, a _puppy_. All you ever were to me was another potential conquest, so don't flatter yourself by thinking that I actually give a shit about your sad little life, new kid."

He looked wounded, like I'd just kicked him directly in the heart, but I was too pissed off to care. I slammed my locker shut.

"From now on," I said coldly. "You are nothing more to me than another member of my Glee Club."

"Stop acting like it meant nothing, Kurt," he said, sounding on the verge of tears. "You know it did."

"You don't know the first thing about me, so don't try and act like you do. I will see you in Glee Club."

"Kurt..."

I walked away before he could stop me. Don't ask me why I was so mad; I'll be the last to know how the hell my mind works. I think it was just because everything was getting so damn _different_. I wasn't used to being around someone who was so genuinely nice. With the obvious exception of my friends, people were only usually nice to me because they were intimidated or they were trying to get into my good books so they could leech off my popularity. And guys were only ever nice to me because they wanted in my pants. But Blaine was literally just... _nice_. And not even like, boring nice. He wasn't boring at all – he was the first guy I'd ever met that I had so much in common with. His niceness was genuine, and that's what I didn't like.

I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't know how to deal with someone who really liked me. Anybody who's ever watched a teen movie knows that the more popular you are, the less people seem to genuinely like you. They want to be your friend, they want to have your life and they want to have sex with you. But they don't _like _you. I was on the top of the social heap, the very top of the food chain, and I'd worked damn hard to get here – there probably aren't many Midwestern high schools that have a high-voiced, effeminate, out and proud gay guy as their head cheerleader and senior class president – so I really wasn't used to anybody genuinely liking me. It was easier that way. I knew where I stood with people. Blaine was just complicating things.

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><p>As usual with my multi-chapter fics, I have no idea how or when this is going to end. Suggestions are always welcome, and I'll try and update as soon as I can.<br>Hope you've enjoyed the fic so far, Humble Readers.

xxx


	6. Chapter 6

Happy New Year, Humble Readers!  
>I would have published this chapter ages ago (technically I finished this last year), but I had no money to go to the internet cafe. Oh, the problems of the poor and internet-less... it's like living in the Dark Ages.<p>

Anyway, as is apparently tradition in my multi-chapter fics, things are getting rather serious. Also I still have no idea how or when this is going to end. I'll be the last to know.

But yeah. Reviews would be nice, so chuck some at me.

And I don't own anything.

* * *

><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Six<strong>

I didn't say a word to him throughout all of Glee Club. But I was very aware that he was staring at me, and it was very distracting. I let Rachel take the lead today, much to her delight, as I just really wasn't in the mood. All I could think about was that stupid encounter with Blaine, and his stupid, pretty, puppy dog eyes gazing longingly at me from the other side of the room.

"So what happened the other night?" Santana whispered to me, as Rachel prattled away about potential competition numbers. "You didn't call me after your date with your puppy."

"That's because there was nothing to tell," I whispered back stiffly.

"So he didn't put out?"

I shook my head. "He didn't want to make our first date _cheap_. He didn't want sex with me to be _meaningless_."

"Ugh, that prude," she scoffed quietly. "What is he, a virgin?"

I just looked at her with an arched eyebrow that spoke a thousand words.

"No way!" she hissed, trying to keep her voice down. "But Frodo went to an all-boys school. And he's not completely unattractive. What the fuck?"

"That's what I thought, but apparently he's waiting for the right moment. He wants it to be special. He also said he really likes me."

Santana looked completely disgusted, and narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "He _really_ likes you? Like, he doesn't _just_ want to get in your pants?"

"Don't worry, I ended it. He'll probably be fawning over me for a while, but whatever. That is the last time I try something a little different, dating-wise. There is nothing wrong with the same old, same old. Also I haven't had sex since I met him, and that just won't do."

"See, this is why I don't fuck guys anymore," she whispered thoughtfully. "Some of them are even more complicated than girls."

"Yes, well I don't really have that option, since girl parts gross me out and everything."

"There's always the Celibacy Club."

We both looked at each other before bursting into quiet giggles. Like _that_ was ever going to happen. No, I just needed something to take my mind of things... someone to help me forget the whole Blaine thing. Ignoring Rachel's incessant talking, I scanned the room. Sam was dating Mercedes now so I couldn't go there; Mercedes would make my death look like an accident if I touch her man. I was only ever an experiment with Mike, who was practically married to Tina now, so he was out. I wasn't even going to bother considering Finn; I wanted to forget my troubles, not get trapped under sweaty sack of potatoes for another four and a half minutes. That just left Puckerman on my list of Glee jocks that would willingly fuck me, no questions asked. Lovely.

Once Glee Club was over I cornered Puck, very aware that Blaine was dawdling behind us by the chairs, tying his shoelaces and fussing with his bag. I knew he was watching but I tried not to care.

"So, Noah," I said, turning my flirt on and purring his first name. "I have the house to myself after school. How about you come over so we can hang out? We can get some wine coolers, rent a movie and _not_ watch it..."

He arched an eyebrow and smirked at me. "Awesome, babe. Been a while since me and you... hung out."

"Wonderful," I said. "I'll see you at 7'o'clock sharp."

I kissed him on the cheek, playfully pushing him away when he pinched my ass.

"See you later, hot stuff," he said with a wink as he left the choir room.

Once he was gone I turned to face Blaine, wiping the flirty smile off my face.

"Eavesdrop much?" I said with contempt.

He frowned right back at me, even though he was blushing as usual.

"So you're going back to 'your type', huh?" he said. "You're pretending like nothing happened between us?"

"Precisely," I said with a false smile. "Nice to know we're on the same page. Is that all? Because I have auditions to oversee."

"I can't believe you, Kurt," he said, looking as if he was trying to control his temper. "I honestly can't believe you. I thought you really liked me. I actually thought that I was lucky enough for you to have feelings for someone like me. But the more I think about it, the more I realise that I'm not the one who should be feeling inadequate."

"Excuse me?" I scoffed.

"I know why you were so pissed off when I turned you down, after what was otherwise a wonderful date," he said, stepping closer to me. "It wasn't because you thought I didn't like you. It was because no one ever says no to you. It wasn't so much being rejected by me, as just being rejected in general. You seriously seem think that just because you're the top of the food chain at this frankly awful school – which, by the way, I am only at because my parents divorced and my mother couldn't afford to keep me in private education – that it somehow makes it okay for you to push everyone around, and be a total bitch, and always get what you want."

"Well, yeah," I said, rolling my eyes. "That's the entire point of being popular, something that a little bottom-feeder like you would never understand."

"I do understand," he said, glaring at me. "Back at Dalton I was lead soloist of Warblers, and the Warblers were like rock stars at that school. We may not have won a lot of competitions, but people still loved us. I had _lots_ of friends, I was popular, but I that didn't mean that I treated everyone else like second class citizens. I didn't abuse my popularity like you and everyone else at this stupid school does. I can't even walk down the hall here without getting shoved into a locker or having a slushie thrown in my face, and even though I've been here for just over two weeks I don't actually have any friends. I'm pretty much starting again from the bottom."

First once I really didn't know what to say. It was weird seeing him so angry.

"You have everything, Kurt," he said bitterly. "You have all the friends and all the guys and all the trophies. And yet a little bottom-feeder like me refuses to blow you, in order to show you some _actual fucking respect_, and you get all pissy. And _I'm_ the one who has to apologise for being nice, because apparently it's terribly impolite to not to treat the great Kurt Hummel like cheap sex object. Well, you know what? I'm sorry!" I flinched as he yelled at me. "My sincerest apologises for offending you, Mr. Senior Class President! I'm sorry that I couldn't be your puppy and treat you like a slut! I'm sorry that I tried to see past your Cheerios uniform and your fucking status! I'm sorry that I dared to try and get to know you! I'm sorry that I didn't want to end our lovely first date by sucking you off in the backseat of your car! I'm sorry for falling for you!"

"Blaine, I..."

"No, Kurt, just forget it!" he said furiously, before taking a deep breath and giving me the dirtiest look I'd ever received. "Have fun fooling around with Puckerman. He's just your type, right? I hope he treats you the way that you want to be treated... and not the way that I treated you. Since obviously that was the wrong way."

He walked out of the choir room without a second glance. I was stunned. I mean... I couldn't believe what had just happened. I sat down on the piano stool before I even realised that I'd moved and then suddenly, out of nowhere, I was in tears. It only lasted about a minute, before I realised that I was still at school and anybody could walk into the room and catch me crying. I wiped my eyes with the handkerchief in my bag, taking a lot of deep breaths to calm down, and checked my reflection in my compact mirror to make sure my skin wasn't blotchy and my eyes weren't too red. I need to push everything that Blaine had said out of my head... push away everything he'd just made me feel. I gave myself a serious look in the mirror.

"You are Kurt Hummel," I said to my reflection. "You are the captain of a champion cheerleading squad, senior class president, and star of an award-winning Glee Club. You run this shitty little school. You're the most popular person at McKinley High, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. You are not a bitch. You are not a slut. You are _popular_. Do not let that dorky, self-righteous little hobbit of a new kid ruin what you worked so damn hard for. Own your high status like you own this school and everyone in it. Nobody says no to you."

I put my mirror back in my bag and made my way to the auditorium for the Glee auditions, fiercely ignoring the hollow feeling in my stomach and using all my strength to hold back the tears that were stinging my eyes.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed the drama, Humble Readers.<br>I'll try and update as soon as I can... once I figure out what's going to happen next. Yeah.

xxx


	7. Chapter 7

I've been suffering from some extra-strength writer's block lately. I seriously cheered when I managed to finish this chapter. But, as usual, I still don't know how this fic is going to end or how long it's actually going to be. Suggestions are always welcome, Humble Readers.

So yeah. Reviews would be nice. If you feel like it.

And I don't own Glee. Obviously.

* * *

><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Seven<strong>

"Oh yeah, Kurt... you're so fucking hot, baby..."

Considering that I had a shirtless Noah Puckerman on top of me, grinding and moaning and kissing my neck, I had never been less in the mood. My entire evening had been ruined by stupid Blaine and his big, self-righteous rant at me in the choir room. All through the auditions in the auditorium I barely had the will to insult any of the no-hopers butchering their songs, even though ordinarily I'd have made someone cry after a few minutes. Instead I just left it up to Rachel, as I tried to push all of Blaine's angry words out of my head.

And now here I was, on my bed with Puck. Not even making out with him could take my mind off things. I still couldn't stop thinking about what Blaine had said. _I'm sorry for falling for you... I_ _hope he treats you the way that you want to be treated... and not the way that I treated you._.. ugh, that stupid new kid was ruining my life, not to mention my ability to enjoy this make out session. I pushed Puck away.

"Hey, what's wrong, baby," he said. "We're just getting started."

I sat up against the headboard and looked at him. He was a little sweaty and breathless, I could see the hard on in his pants, and his horribly overgrown mohawk was plastered to his head.

"Noah," I said seriously. "What's your favourite thing about me?"

"You're ass," he said immediately. "No doubt about it. That ass is magic, especially in your Cheerios track pants."

He tried to kiss me, but I pushed him away again. After a pause, I asked "What's my favourite musical?"

Puck scoffed and shrugged. "I dunno, but that's kinda off topic, don't you think?"

"Who's my favourite designer?" I asked.

He looked at me like I was insane. "Kurt, what's wrong with you? I thought you wanted to hook up?"

I sighed. "Yeah... so did I."

"Babe, you've been quiet all night," he said cautiously. "Usually you're totally into it."

"I'm just... I'm not really in the mood," I said quietly.

He laughed, like it was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. I really didn't appreciate being laughed at.

"It's not funny, Noah," I said, glaring at him.

"It's kinda funny," he chuckled. "You're _always_ in the mood, baby. And you were the one that asked me over, so I figured you wanted to fuck."

"I am at perfect liberty to change my mind, Noah," I said, my anger from earlier rising up inside me. "And frankly I've never been less turned on by you. I think you should leave."

He was still laughing. "Come on, baby! Quit being so weird!"

I shoved him away completely and sat on the edge of the bed. I felt him move behind me, his hands rubbing my shoulders, and he pressed his lips against the back of my neck.

"Kurt," he said gently. "Baby, I get that you're upset about... something. But let's not let it screw up our night. So I don't know what your favourite musical is or whatever? Big deal. I still know how to make you come real hard..."

"Go away, Puckerman," I said without looking at him. "My father will be home soon and if he finds you in my bedroom he'll most likely castrate you. And I don't think I have the energy to stop him."

Puck took his hands off me, and I heard him get off the bed with a huff. I didn't turn to watch, but I knew that he was putting his shirt back on and he slammed the door of my basement bedroom and my front door as he left. I wasn't sorry that he was gone. I just put some music on and lay down on my bed, thinking. This was probably the first time that I'd past up the opportunity to have some casual, meaningless sex. Not that I'd ever had sex that wasn't meaningless in one way or another. I'd never even really had a boyfriend, just various conquests. And before Blaine came along I didn't care at all. It was better that way. I didn't need feelings. Hell, I didn't even need eye contact.

But now I couldn't stop thinking about what I might have been missing. And I definitely couldn't stop thinking about everything Blaine had said.

School the next day was awful. Blaine was blanking me in much the same why that I had done the day before. He was ignoring me in a pointed, painful kind of way that I would have found impressive if I hadn't been on the receiving end. I didn't actually catch him looking at me during Glee Club, but more than once I could feel my skin prickling, as if his silent glares were actually burning me. He'd gone from fawning over me and blushing every time our eyes met, to pretty much hating my guts in a heroically short amount of time. I shouldn't have cared, but I really did.

After school Rachel took me for coffee at the Lima Bean as a way of lifting my spirits somewhat. She may have been absurdly self-absorbed, but even she could tell that something was bother in me.

"Nothing a grande non-fat mocha won't fix," she said brightly.

"Only if you're buying," I muttered.

The place was pretty crowded, and once we got our coffee we scanned the room for a free table. And that's when my heart sank. There was Blaine, as dorkily dressed yet inexplicably fuckable as ever, drinking his coffee... and talking to some guy. This guy – who I disliked on sight – was tall and slim and, I suppose, not completely unattractive, wearing a Dalton Academy uniform. He had a flirty smirk on his meerkat-ish face that made me homicidal. I immediately wanted to know who he was, mainly because it was easier to despise someone when I had a little back story to justify it.

"Hey, there's Blaine," Rachel said happily. She still had a misguided crush on him. "Maybe we can go sit with him? I'm sure he's friend won't mind."

"I'd rather not," I said stiffly. "Blaine and I aren't really on speaking terms right now."

"Why?" she asked. "What happened? I heard from Brittany that you guys went on a date."

"Yeah, well it didn't work out," I said, not taking my eyes of Blaine and that guy.

"You should go and talk to him," said Rachel. "If not for your own sake, then for the Glee Club's. You know how difficult it is for us to perform to the highest standard when people are fighting. Go and try to work it out."

I gave her a withering look. Even when she was trying to be helpful it was always to benefit her somehow.

"No, thank you," I said. "I think I'd rather, mmm, I don't know... break all my fingers with a hammer."

"Oh, go on, Kurt," she insisted. "I'm sure you guys can work this out and put whatever happened behind you. I'll even leave you to it. I've got to get home anyway. I need to start storyboarding the choreography for our next number."

She gave me a little shove in Blaine's direction before I could argue.

"Go talk to him!" she said, before rushing out of the coffee shop with a swish of her ugly plaid skirt.

With a heavy sigh, I made my way as slowly as I possibly could towards Blaine and his Dalton friend. They were laughing together, and the smirky guy rested his hand on Blaine's arm. I wanted to hurl.

"Hey, Blaine," I said with a friendly smile I usually reserved for teachers I was trying to get on the good side of.

He looked up and frowned at me. "Hey."

My stomach lurched at the look on his face, but I refused to let him see how much he was getting to me.

"Is it okay if I join you guys?" I asked.

He looked like he was struggling to hold back a flurry of swear words and insults that he probably would have said out loud if we weren't in public. Eventually he let out a stiff "Sure."

As I took a seat and put my coffee on the table, the guy from Dalton who I wanted to hit said "Blaine, sweetie, aren't you going to introduce us?"

_Sweetie?_ Oh God...

"Oh, right," Blaine said uncomfortably. "This is Kurt Hummel. Kurt, this is..."

"I'm Sebastian Smythe," he said, offering me his hand which I shook rather reluctantly. "I'm Blaine's boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" I said incredulously.

"_Ex_-boyfriend," Blaine said, rolling his eyes.

Sebastian just chuckled, giving Blaine a playful little nudge. "Details, details..."

I had never wanted to punch someone so much in my entire life.

"So Kurt," Sebastian said, sounding so self-satisfied it was unreal. "Blainers here has told me _so_ much about you. It's not every day I get to meet a _male _head cheerleader."

"Yes, well," I said, fixing the friendly smile on my face. "There's nothing wrong with the unexpected."

Blaine's face had gone red – not his usual bashful rosiness, but a blotchy flush.

"I need some more coffee," he mumbled, before leaving the table without another word.

Sebastian's smirk became a little less self-satisfied and a little more devious as he gave me a quick once over. I finally got rid of my friendly smile and glared at him.

"You know, my Blainers told me the two of you went on a date," he said smoothly. "I'm pretty sure that won't be happening again, since he seemed so terribly... disappointed. You should have known better than to try and pressure Blaine into backseat sex."

"He told you that?" he said, narrowing my eyes.

"Not in so many words," Sebastian said with a shrug. "He's always been adorably bashful about 'being intimate', as he calls it. I mean, I don't blame you for wanting to fuck him. But I honestly don't blame _him_ for turning you down. The way he went on about you I thought you'd be much hotter..."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "You're one to talk. I assumed, since Blaine immediately had a crush on me when he transferred to McKinley High, that he had decent taste in guys. But obviously not if he stooped low enough to go out with you."

He laughed disdainfully, and I struggled to resist the urge to throw my piping hot coffee in his face.

"You _are_ a feisty little cheerleader, aren't you?" he said patronisingly. "What are you going to do, hit me with your pompoms?"

"Oh, bite me, Smythe," I sneered. "I seriously have no idea what Blaine even saw in you."

"You have eyes, don't you?" he said smugly.

"Yes, and all I'm seeing is a skinny dick with a smirky meerkat face, spouting arrogant bullshit," I said, giving him the dirtiest look I could muster. "It's not at all surprising that you're Blaine's _ex_. Everybody makes mistakes."

"The only reason Blaine and I broke up is because he had to transfer to your shitty little school," he said conceitedly. "He's wasted at McCrappy High. But I'll have him back in no time, especially since you've screwed him over so wonderfully. Hopefully you've destroyed his self-esteem just enough for me to _finally_ get him in the sack. Thank you in advance, Gay Face."

I couldn't believe this guy. I was used to being around mean people, like Santana or Coach Sylvester, people who were bitchy in a way that I could appreciate. But this guy... ugh, I just hated him. I hated him so much that I was actually speechless.

"You have no idea how tedious it was back in the day," Sebastian continued causally. "There I was dating by far the hottest guy in Dalton – well, second hottest after me – but no matter how much I buttered him up, he just wouldn't let me pop his cherry. Oh, we'd make out and so on, but he was just so old fashioned. He was constantly spewing all this garbage about wanting it to be _meaningful_ and blah, blah, blah. And I humoured him in the hopes that he'd give it up eventually. That's where you went wrong, Kurt. You can't come on too strong with Blainers or it'll scare him away. Of course, I did have to do _something_ about all that frustration, but that's why they invented fake IDs and late night hook-ups in gay bars, right? But now, thanks to you and your slutty, gay-faced cheerleader ways, I may finally get a chance to tap that. I owe you one."

Blaine came back before I could even begin to think of a response to all of that. Just as he sat down with his fresh medium drip, I pushed my own untouched coffee away and stood up.

"I have to go," I said quickly. "I'll see you tomorrow, Blaine."

"Lovely meeting you, Kurt," Sebastian said with a wide, boastful grin. "We have to do this again some time."

I got the hell out of there before I could pick up my chair and hit him with it. Not only had I made Blaine hate me, but I'd potentially pushed him right back into the arms of that absolutely bastard. And, worst of all, I had no idea how to fix it.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed, Humble Readers.<p>

xxx


	8. Chapter 8

I've been away from the internet cafe for so long that I managed to write this whole chapter a lot quicker than I thought. You lovely Humble Readers are getting a double whammy of fanfic goodness. And this chapter is really long too, so you guys are very welcome.

Anyway, reviews are very much equal to love. So chuck some at me.

And I don't own Glee. Obviously.

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><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Eight<strong>

Thursday's pep rally was a roaring success and, even though I had so much distracting me, the Cheerios routine was performed to perfection and went down a storm, especially with all the guys in the crowd. Coach Sylvester couldn't even think of anything to insult us about, so we really must have been good. The Titans miraculously won Friday night's game against Carmel High, although only just. They really weren't the most amazing team, and the majority of spectators usually only came to their games to watch us Cheerios – not only had we won considerably more trophies than the football team, but we had bendy girls in short skirts and my general hotness, so there was something for everyone.

I'd already organised a party at my house after the game, but since I (like everyone) was assuming that the team was going to lose, it was supposed to be a way of lifting everyone's spirits rather than celebrating. All the same, it seemed like most of the school was there. I put Puck and Sam in charge of providing alcohol, while Mercedes and Tina were in charge of the music, and I'd spent most of the day picking out the perfect party outfit with Santana and Brittany – form-fitting, eye-catching and insanely sexy without being vulgar. The celebrations hadn't even been going on for that long but I'd already lost count of the amount of guys that had already checked me out. But, although I hated to admit it to myself, there was one guy in particular that I was looking for, but I was yet to find him anywhere.

I looked around to find pretty much everyone enjoying themselves. Santana and Brittany were grinding along to the music on top of the coffee table, to the delight of most of the guys in the room – Britt was kind of a stripper drunk and was already wearing less clothing than when the party started. Mercedes and Sam were dancing together. Tina and Mike were dancing together while making out at the same time. Puck, Finn and Artie were having some kind of drinking contest in the kitchen. Rachel, who was dressed like a kindergarten teacher, was talking and obviously flirting with her old boyfriend, Jesse St. James, former member of Carmel's show choir and our only real competition, Vocal Adrenaline – and before you ask, yes, he's a former conquest. Quinn was sitting by herself, nursing her drink and ignoring everyone accept Rachel, who she couldn't seem to take her eyes off of.

But I couldn't seem to find Blaine anywhere. Had he not come to the party at all? That seemed unlikely, since Rachel was sure to have bugged him to come until he gave in. So was he just avoiding me? I wouldn't have been surprised if he had been, as he still wasn't speaking to me.

"Rachel," I said, making her snap out of staring longingly at Jesse. "Do you know if Blaine is here?"

"I think so," she said. "He said he was going to come. Ooh, have you guys worked it out yet? Have you stopped fighting?"

"Not yet," I said, trying not to sound too disappointed. "Rach, be a dear and go look for him for me? I haven't even had a chance to have a drink yet. Don't talk to him though, just tell me where he is. Thanks."

She obviously didn't like being told what to do, but she obeyed none the less.

"Didn't expect you to be here, St. James," I said, flirting a little before I could stop myself.

"Well, Rachel invited me," said Jesse. "I'm home from college for a while, and you know how persistent Rachel can be."

"It's certainly nice to see you again," I said with a smirk. "It's been a while. A year, if I'm not mistaken."

As overly confident as Jesse was, he was already blushing.

"So have you told Rachel about us yet?" I said casually.

Jesse nearly choked on his drink. "Of course not! It was just one time; letting off steam at Nationals, resolving some sexual tension. Rachel doesn't need to know."

"I don't know why you care," I said. "You guys aren't even dating anymore."

"Yes, but we _were_ dating at the time," said Jesse, smiling in spite of himself. "So what happened between you and I was still technically cheating."

"In my defence, she was cheating on you with Finn anyway. And you loved it."

"Yeah..."

Rachel suddenly rushed back to us. "Kurt, Blaine's over by the stairs. He's talking to that friend of his, you know the guy from Dalton that he was with when he saw him at the Lima Bean the other day."

I felt a horrible knot in my stomach. "Thanks, Rach. See you later, Jesse."

So Blaine was here with fucking Sebastian. Sebastian Smythe was actually in my house, that absolute bastard! When I got to the stairs I saw _him_ standing alone, nodding his head to the music as he sipped his drink and checked out every guy that walked past. When he saw me coming towards him a wide, self-satisfied smirk spread across his face, and I immediately wanted to punch him.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I said, glaring at him.

"Blaine invited me, of course," he said, sounding so pleased with himself. "He wanted to have at least one person to talk to, since he was _dreading _seeing you. Great party, by the way, Gay Face. I didn't realise McCrappy High had so many hot guys. You and the rest of your cheer-skanks must be spoilt for choice. If I don't manage to get my Blainers drunk enough to put out tonight, I'll just have to sink my teeth into one of these tasty jocks. Blaine already told me that you've fucked nearly all of them, so it shouldn't be difficult for me."

"You are such a pig," I spat angrily. "And I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that Blaine never goes anywhere near you."

"Good luck with that, Gay Face," he chuckled.

"Go fuck yourself, asshole," I said with an ugly frown. "But make sure to use protection when you do. I'm sure not even you know where you've been."

It was then that Blaine came down the stairs. He must have been in the bathroom, and for once his outfit wasn't completely dorky, although he still wasn't wearing socks. He looked gorgeous, even though he wasn't in the least bit pleased to see me. But Sebastian had pissed me off so much that I didn't even try to be nice to him.

"I need to talk to you, Baby Gap," I said forcefully. "In private, and definitely away from this jerk-off." I inclined my head towards Sebastian, who just raised his eyebrows at me.

Blaine frowned. "Fine, but make it quick."

As I led Blaine away Sebastian called out "Lovely talking to you, Kurt!"

"Bite me, dickhead!" I said, giving him the finger without even turning around.

"Kurt!" Blaine said, outraged. "What is wrong with you? Sebastian was trying to be _nice!_"

I just rolled my eyes as I led him down to my basement bedroom, which was strictly out of bounds and guaranteed to gives us some privacy. The moment we were down the stairs I rounded on him.

"Why the hell did you bring him here?"

"Sebastian is a good friend of mine," Blaine said defensively. "I don't understand what your problem is with him."

"He's an _asshole_," I said, frustrated. "And I won't let you get back together with him."

"You _won't let me_?" Blaine said incredulously. "Since when did I need your permission to do anything? And since when was it any of your business who I date?"

"I'm trying to protect you, Blaine," I said, trying and failing to calm down. "Sebastian is _bad news_. He doesn't deserve you."

"What, and you do?" he said, he face flushed. "You're just pissed off because I've moved on. I had a dumb crush on you and you tossed me aside, but now that there's someone who actually cares about me in the mix, all of a sudden you want me again."

"He doesn't care about you," I insisted. "You should hear some of the things he says when you're not around. You're just another conquest to him."

"Are you sure you're not talking about yourself, Kurt?" he sneered. "That's all I was to you, right? Yet another conquest. All the time that Sebastian and I were dating he was the perfect gentleman. He _cared_ about me and my feelings, and he didn't force me into anything."

"He was buttering you up," I said. I was starting to get a headache. "He told me. He just wants in your pants, and once he gets what he wanted he's going to toss you aside."

"Bullshit!" Blaine said furiously. "You're only saying that because he's competition! Well, you lost your chance with me, Kurt, so just give it up and quit being so petty!"

He turned to leave, but I grabbed him by the arm. He tried to shove me off but I was much stronger than him.

"For once in my life I'm actually trying to do the right thing here," I said, refusing to let go of him. "I'm not trying to get you back, because I know I've completely screwed things up with you. But I can't just stand by and watch you go back to that guy – that _pig _– because he's just going to mess with you even more than I did. I know that I'm a horrible, manipulative, promiscuous bitch. I'm the most popular guy in school, it's part of my job description. And I know that I treated you awfully. But at least I'm honest about how horrible I am. Sebastian has put up this facade of the perfect gentleman for you, but the moment you're out of earshot he's even worse than me."

Blaine didn't say anything, but he stopped struggling. I still held on to his arm, looking at him imploringly.

"You deserve so much better than him," I said, feelings tears prickling my eyes. "You deserve so much better than both of us. You are the nicest guy I've ever met... and I'm so sorry that I made you hate me. I'm so sorry that I hurt you, and I just don't want to see you get hurt again."

I finally let go of him and turned away, impatiently wiping away the tears that were forming in my eyes as I went to sit on the edge of the bed. I expected him to leave, but instead he just stood there. Then he slowly came to sit next to me.

"You're not making this up, are you?" he said softly.

I shook my head, not quite trusting my voice just yet.

"What did Sebastian say to you then?" he asked. "What did he do to make you hate him so much?"

I sighed. Where do I begin?

"At first it really was just jealousy," I said quietly. "I saw the two of you together at the Lima Bean and you're right, it really did piss me off. But when you left me and him alone, everything he said... ugh, it just made me want to hit him. He thanked me for hurting you so much, because it meant that he could get you back. He said he hoped your self-esteem was so low thanks to me that you'd finally give in and have sex with him. That's all he's ever wanted; he told me. He acted all kind and courteous to make you fall for him, but that fact that you wouldn't put out frustrated him. It frustrated him enough to go out to gay bars and hook up with random guys behind your back. He even said just now that if he couldn't get you drunk tonight he would find someone else at the party to fuck instead."

Blaine stared at me, clearly speechless. Once again he reminded me of a puppy, one that had just been kicked by a cruel owner. Finally he said "He... he cheated on me?"

"Apparently," I said. "A number of times, unless he was just exaggerating."

"I can't believe it," he whispered, crestfallen. "He said he cared about me... he said... he said he loved me."

"I'm so sorry, Blaine," I said, wanting more than anything to just give him a hug. "I hate to be the one to tell you all this."

"No, its okay," he said, his voice cracking. His eyes were sparkling with tears. "I'm glad you told me. God, I can't believe how fucking stupid I am. I'm so gullible. And I really have the shittest taste in guys. First I fall for Sebastian's lies... and then I fall for you."

I felt my stomach knot with guilt again. It seemed like he still hated me. There was a moment of silence between us, where all I could hear were the sounds of the party raging on upstairs. Blaine sniffed, and I saw him wipe a few tears off his cheeks with his sleeve.

"You're not stupid, Blaine," I finally said. "Far from it. All that stuff you said to me a few days ago... it was completely true, and even though I tried to forget and pretend like nothing had happened, I really deserved being put in my place like that. You were right. I'm not used to people saying no to me."

Blaine didn't say anything. He was still wiping his eyes on his sleeve, taking shaky breaths.

"You really are the nicest guy I've ever met, you know," I said in a would-be casual voice. "You're the nicest guy whose life I've ever ruined. You deserve to fall in love. You deserve epic romance. Not jerks like Sebastian. Or spoilt sluts like me."

"I should... I should go back upstairs," Blaine said, trying to pull himself together. "I need to find Sebastian... and tell me to stay away from me."

He stood up, roughly wiping his eyes, and I stood up too. He looked so heartbroken, so completely defeated. I just wanted to hold him and tell him that everything was going to be okay, as mushy as that sounded. I don't know what came over me, but I took of both his hands and, encouraged by the fact that he wasn't stopping me, I pulled him closer and kissed him, so much gentler than the first time I had. I felt him tense up and pulled away, immediately regretting it.

"I'm sorry," I sputtered, and I could feel myself blushing. "I really shouldn't have..."

But I never got to finish my sentence. Blaine caught my lips in a kiss, holding me close, and all thoughts of returning to the party left my mind. So I guess he didn't still hate me after all.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed, Humble Readers.<p>

I don't know when I'll update next, but I _will_ update at some point. I shan't leave you hanging.

xxx


	9. Chapter 9

You're getting another double whammy of chapters today. Part Ten was originally going to be part of this one, it was so long that I thought I'd split it into two.  
>Also I think I've finally figured out how to end this fic. Kind of. Maybe. I think.<p>

Anyway, throw some reviews in my general direction.

And it goes without saying that I don't own Glee.

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><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Nine<strong>

"I... I thought you hated me now?" I whispered once our lips separated.

Blaine rested his forehead against mine, looking right into my eyes. His hazel eyes were startling this close up, especially considering how intensely he was looking at me.

"I tried," he said quietly. "I tried to hate you, but... I kept on remembering how our date went before... before the _car park_. You were so sweet, so easy to talk to. And it's that side of you I can't help but like, even if there's so much about you that I really shouldn't."

He reached up and stroked my cheek, and for once it was me who was blushing. He pulled me close to him and kissed me again, and I couldn't stop myself from sighing. He really was the most amazing kisser. I don't even know how long we stood there, but I just didn't care. I could hear the party going on upstairs, all my friends getting drunk and having fun without me. But I was down here, kissing Blaine, and there was nowhere else I'd rather be. I wasn't going to mess this up this time; I refused to let myself ruin this again. If I carried on acting like my usual promiscuous self then sooner or later I'd be no better that Sebastian – sleeping around and tossing nice guys aside like their feelings didn't matter. Blaine may have still been the dorky new kid, but he mattered to me. He really did. Seriously, I mean it.

We held each other for a while as we separated. Blaine looked as he was trying not to cry again.

"Do you want to go back up to the party?" I asked gently. "You still need to find Sebastian and tell him where to shove it."

He chuckled a little sadly. I could tell that it was in spite of himself.

"Not yet," he said. "I don't even know what I'm going to say to him."

He let go of me and sat down on the edge of my bed. I followed and sat beside him, tentatively placing my hand on top of his. I was worried that he'd snatch his hand away, but instead he turned his hand and laced his fingers with mine.

"I can help you if you want," I offered. "You know, if you're not up to facing Sebastian on your own."

"I'm not really great with confrontation," Blaine said, his cheeks going rosy. "It just... brings back memories."

"Of what?" I asked.

Blaine looked at me incredulously. "You actually want to know about my life?"

"I actually do," I said with a smile, squeezing his hand.

He looked at me for a second, his eyes travelling down to our entwined hands, before he finally started to speak.

"McKinley is actually the third high school I've been to. I was bullied really badly at the school I was at before Dalton, not just for being gay but... I don't know, I guess I was just an easy target. I got beaten up pretty much every other day, and whenever I tried to fight back it would just make it worse – all those jocks were so much bigger than me, so I basically had to just lie back and take it. I transferred to Dalton half way through freshman year, and I was finally safe and happy. I had friends and I was Warbler and... and I had Sebastian. But then I had to transfer to McKinley and it was like being at my old school again; lots of huge jocks pushing me around. I don't really know how to stick up for myself. It's probably why people walk all over me so much."

"Well, that's what I'm here for," I said. "To stick up for you."

"Really?" he said, his voice barely a whisper.

I nodded. "Remember, I run that school. One word from me and no one will ever touch you again. And as for Sebastian... let's just say he won't be quite so smug once I've finished verbally castrating him. I'm not going to let him hurt you, Blaine. I know you're not good at confrontation, but now is the time to fight back. This isn't just some dumb jock pushing you around. This is a smarmy, heartless, most likely STD-ridden bastard who is fucking with your emotions just so you can be another notch on his bedpost. Give him a piece of your mind... just like you did with me. That worked like a charm, by the way. Bravo."

We both laughed, and I felt him squeeze my hand a little bit. Finally he stood up again, taking me with him. He let go of my hand and shook himself out like he did just before performing in Glee Club. He was psyching himself up and shaking away his nervous.

"Okay," he said, more to himself than to me. "I'm ready. I can do this."

"I know you can," I said. "Can I ask you a quick question though?"

"Oh," he said, looking at me. "Okay then."

I could feel the heat rising in my face again. "This is going to sound so weird, under the circumstances, but... what's your favourite thing about me?"

Blaine raised his eyebrows in surprise, but answered me after a second of contemplation.

"Well, you have really beautiful eyes," he said, blushing. "I can't really tell if they're blue or green, but they're gorgeous. Also you're so talented. I mean, when you perform with the Cheerios it's totally breathtaking, but also the times I've heard you sing during Glee Club have been amazing; you're voice is so... _moving_. And also you're so confident and strong, like you're not afraid of anything, like you could take on the world, and... and that was way more than just one thing. I'm sorry for rambling."

"No, don't apologise," I said, grinning at him. "That was the right answer."

He smiled bashfully at me, and I had an overwhelming urge to kiss him again. But I decided against it. We needed to get back to the party. We needed to find Sebastian.


	10. Chapter 10

**Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Ten**

When Blaine and I went back up to the party it was a bit of a mission to find Sebastian. He wasn't where we'd left him by the stairs, and there seemed to be even more people in my house than before I'd gone down to my room. This didn't worry me, as all the valuables had been locked away and I'd roped in all the Glee Club and most of the Cheerios into helping with the clean up tomorrow.

Eventually we managed to get into the living room. Two Cheerios were now dancing up on the coffee table in the place of Santana and Brittany, who were sitting together on the couch; Santana appeared to be sobbing onto Brittany's shoulder. Sam and Mercedes were talking and laughing in a corner. Tina and Mike were making out up against a wall as if no one could see them. Rachel and Jesse were making out on the other couch. Quinn was still sitting in exactly the same place, pointedly ignoring all the couples around her, but staring daggers at Rachel and Jesse. I assumed from the boisterous laughter I could hear that Puck, Finn and Artie were still drinking in the kitchen. And there at the other end of the living room with Sebastian. And he wasn't alone.

As if unconsciously proving my point to Blaine about him, Sebastian was blatantly flirting with a cute, tipsy blonde guy I vaguely recognised from my Geometry class. Sebastian was touching the guy's arm, brushing a strand of straggly blonde hair out of the guy's face, before he reached into his pocket and pulled out a little bottle of vodka, and poured a generous amount of it into the blonde guy's cup. I glanced at Blaine beside me and was taken aback. I don't think I'd ever seen him so furious, not even when he was yelling at me. He was actually trembling. Without another word to me, he walked slowly up to Sebastian, who was so busy flirting that he didn't even notice. I walked a step behind Blaine, ready to jump in at any moment.

"Sebastian!" Blaine said, making his voice heard over the loud music.

Sebastian turned in surprise, but quickly composed his face into a pleasant smile that made me want to smack him. I noticed him slip his little bottle of vodka back into his pocket.

"There you are, Blainers," he said cheerily. "For a second there I though Hummel had kidnapped you."

Blaine scowled. "You make me sick, Sebastian. I don't _ever_ want to see you again."

Sebastian just laughed. "Blaine, sweetheart, where's all this come from?"

"I'm not your sweetheart!" Blaine yelled. "And I'm not getting back together with you! You're a liar and cheat!"

Sebastian was still smirking as if this was all a joke, but he slowly looked over Blaine's shoulder to me, and his eyes were as cold as ice.

"What's he been telling you, Blaine?" he said, still looking at me and smirking. "Because I can assure you that it's all bullshit."

"Kurt told me the truth," said Blaine, shaking with rage "He told everything that you said to him when I was out of earshot. Everything you and I had was a lie!"

"According to _him_," Sebastian scoffed. "Obviously he churned out all those lies to get back in your good books, but who are you going to believe – him, the shallow little fucker who hurt you, or me, your loving boyfriend?"

"You are _not_ my boyfriend, Sebastian!" Blaine shouted. "And I will not let you walk all over me again!"

I noticed that people were watching us now. All the canoodling couples had separated and were staring. Someone had turned the music down, evidently so that everyone in the room could hear what was going on. The tipsy blonde guy was edging away from us, looking awkward.

"I can't believe this," said Sebastian with an incredulous chuckle. "I can't believe you're falling for all of Hummel's bullshit. I've known you for two and a half years, but it's the bitchy cheerleader you've known for five minutes that you're siding with. I thought you were smarter than this, Blainers."

"Stop calling me that," Blaine said fiercely. "Stop acting like I'm some dumb little kid that you can patronise and push around, that you can just say a few charming words to, pat on the head and then do whatever you want to. Okay, so Kurt's treated me awfully, but at least he's been honest, and at least he's apologised. He told me everything that you said to him, and I've just seen you obviously flirting with someone else, and yet you're _still_ denying it. You're still acting like this is just a big joke."

Sebastian didn't respond to Blaine, but instead rounded on me.

"Pleased with yourself, are you?" he said, smirking as his cold eyes glared at me. "Happy that he believed all your crap about me?"

"Crap, was it?" I said, giving him the dirtiest look. "I hadn't even known you for five minutes before you spilled the beans to me." I put on a deep, smug voice to imitate him. "_'You have no idea how tedious it was... no matter how much I buttered him up, he just wouldn't let me pop his cherry... Hopefully you've destroyed his self-esteem just enough for me to finally get him in the sack. Thank you in advance, Gay Face.'_ I remember every word of what you said to me, mainly because every word of it made me want to kick you in nuts. I know you don't think very much of me, slutty, gay-faced cheer-shank that I am, but I know that I'm better than you. I know that I will introduce you to a world of pain if you ever even think of coming near Blaine again. And I know that you need to get the fuck out of my house before I throw you out."

Sebastian pushed Blaine aside and squared up to me, still smirking in that disgustingly self-satisfied way. He was taller than me, but in a lanky, unimpressive kind of way. I noticed that Sam and Mike had edged slightly away from the respective girlfriends, ready to jump in and defend me at the first sign of trouble. Quinn wasn't feigning nonchalance as usual, but scowling at Sebastian from her seat. Rachel looked nervous, as if a fist-fight was about to break out in front of her. Mercedes looked ready to bring the pain if Sebastian touched me, and Santana (no longer in tears) looked like she was inches away from going all Lima Heights. Puck, Finn and Artie were in the room now too, and were also ready to defend me at the drop of a hat.

"Such a feisty little cheerleader, aren't you?" Sebastian scoffed, looking down at me. "You're going to throw me out, huh? Lifting those pompoms must have given you such _strong_ arms."

He laughed to himself, but nobody else did. I arched an eyebrow at him with a look of contempt.

"I said get out of my house," I said slowly.

"Oooh, I'm _so_ scared!" Sebastian said sarcastically, before turning to Blaine. "You don't seriously believe him, do you? He's obviously told you all this bullshit about me to get you back."

"I didn't tell him the truth about you to get him back," I said, glowering at him. "I told him because I couldn't stand to see someone as kind and sweet and undeserving as him being inflicted with _you_. I couldn't sit back and watch while you carried on lying to him."

"And I'm not going to let you lie to me again," Blaine added, still shaking with anger. "All you ever wanted from me was sex. I actually thought that you loved me and respected me, but you were just buttering me up until I gave you want you wanted, and you were _cheating_ on me at the same time. I'm glad that Kurt told me the truth about you, and I'm glad I saw you flirting with someone else tonight. If none of that had happened I would've gotten back together with you, and I probably would've slept with you eventually. And then I'd find all this out the hard way. Well you know what, Sebastian? I'd rather be a friendless nobody than be your friend. I'd rather before alone forever than be your boyfriend. And I'd rather die a virgin than have sex with you. Now get out and don't ever come near me again."

The smirk was wiped off Sebastian's face and replaced with an ugly sneer.

"You heard the man, Smythe," I said with a mocking smile. "Take your smirky meerkat face and your tiny, disease-ridden prick and get the fuck out of my house before go get my Dad's shotgun. And before you start squaring up to me, please bear in mind that you're currently standing in a room full of people that would happily kick the living shit out of you if you laid a finger on me."

Sebastian looked around the room and was met with several glaring faces, each looking at him like he was something gross they'd just trodden in.

"Oh yeah, I forgot you ran things at McCrappy High, Gay Face," he said scathingly, before looking at Blaine. "You're better than this. We're better than _them._ You don't need the approval of these _jocks_ and _cheerleaders_, Blaine. We're _above_ all these Neanderthals."

"Kurt told you to leave," Sam suddenly said. "So leave."

"Yeah, man, get the hell out!" said Finn angrily

Everyone was standing up and putting their drinks down, ready to use force to get Sebastian out of my house if need be.

"Don't make me go all Lima Heights Adjacent on your ass, slut-face," said Santana fiercely. "I fucking dare you to try something." And then she said something in Spanish that was definitely a threat.

"We'll fuck you're shit up if you don't leave, asshole," said Puck, clenching his fists. "You mess with one of us and you mess with all of us. And Blaine is _one of us_."

Everyone was yelling now.

"Yeah, Blaine's one of us!"

"Leave him alone, jerk!"

"Get the fuck out of here!"

"You're not wanted here, man, fuck off!"

Sebastian was looking around at everyone shouting at him, trying to glare at them all even though he was obviously scared. Finally he looked at Blaine and shook his head.

"Fuck it," he said. "You may be a fine piece of ass, Blaine, but a sap like you isn't worth all this effort."

Sebastian gave me one last cold look, as I smirked smugly at him. "You win, Gay Face."

He turned and left, his eyes on the ground as everyone jeered at him.

"Lovely talking to you, Sebastian!" I called after him. "Don't let the door hit you on the ass on the way out!"

Everybody laughed, the music was turned back up and the party continued. Rachel and Jesse congratulated me and Blaine on how well we dealt with Sebastian. Artie brought us both some drinks. Sam, Puck, Finn and Mike were all insisting that they'd have kicked Sebastian's ass if I'd said the word. Even Quinn managed to crack a smile. But Blaine didn't look too pleased. I pulled him away to a relatively quiet part of the hallway.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I just... I don't really feel like celebrating right now," he said forlornly, handing me back the untouched drink Artie had given him. "I think I'm just going to go home."

"Are you sure?" I said. I really didn't want him to leave.

He nodded sadly. He looked so heartbroken.

"Do you want me to give you a ride home or something?" I offered.

"No thanks, it's okay," he said. "I haven't had anything to drink tonight, I'll be fine."

I knew there was no way of getting him to stay, so I walked him to his car and gave him a hug goodbye.

"Thank you, Kurt," he whispered against my shoulder, holding me tightly. "Thank you for sticking up for me."

"Any time," I said as he separated. "That's what I'm here for.

I kissed him on the cheek and he smiled a little, blushing in the glow of the streetlights, before he got into his car and drove off.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed, Humble Readers.<br>I'll update as soon as I can, my lovelies.

xxx


	11. Chapter 11

After all the angst and drama, it's high time for something a bit more cheerful. So prepare thyselves, dearest Humble Readers, for epic amounts of fluff.

I've decided that this is going to be the penultimate chapter of this fic. I know, I know, we're all sad that this is the beginning of the end. But I promise that the last chapter will actually be smutty. There will be some Klaine sex if it bloody well kills me.

Anyway, chuck some reviews at me.

And I obviously don't own Glee.

* * *

><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Eleven <strong>

After the party at my house I hadn't expected things to be perfect straight away and, to be honest, they weren't. Blaine and I were on speaking terms at least, but it was awkward as hell. I hadn't expected him to go back to fawning all over me again just because Sebastian was out of the picture. Too much had happened between us in such a short amount of time that it would have been unrealistic of me to assume that he could just forget the past. I was taking things slow, giving him time to get over everything that had happened to him. As much as I still wanted to take a baseball bat to Sebastian's smug little meerkat face, he did get one thing right – you can't rush things with Blaine. I didn't want to scare him away.

After a few weeks a plan suddenly popped into my head. I knew that Blaine was a hopeless romantic. He'd said so on our first date – which felt like a million years ago – and so many of his favourite movies and musicals were love stories. Blaine still liked me, I was sure of that. But what I wasn't sure of was whether he knew how much I cared about him. So I needed to show him. Blaine needed to be _wooed_.

Now I didn't have much experience in wooing. I didn't need to woo anybody, because nobody had ever said no to me. But that didn't mean that I didn't know what I was doing. What Blaine needed was a first date do-over. He'd said it himself that our date had been wonderful... right up until I'd ruined it. I just needed to take all that perfection from that first date and triple it. The romance needed to be off the scale, regardless of how corny it got. Anything to make Blaine see how much I really cared about him.

I held an impromptu slumber party with all my Glee girls in order to brainstorm ways to make this first date do-over better than perfect. Amazingly, it was Quinn who came up with the best idea.

"You said that Blaine likes musicals and Broadway romance just like you do, right?" she said gloomily.

"Yeah," I said as I braided Rachel's hair. "It's one of the many things we have in common."

"So why don't you add some of that to the date," said Quinn, with a nonchalant shrug. "Make it a surprise for him. You could get all the guys in Glee Club to serenade you two over dinner or something. Pick the right song and he'd find it really sweet."

We all stared at her. It had been a long time since any of us had heard her say so many words, or say anything so optimistic. We were all much more used to her just silently judging everyone.

"That's actually a really great idea, Quinnie," I finally said.

She rolled her eyes, brushing her messy pink hair out of her face. "You don't have to sound so surprised."

I tried to imagine it in my head; Blaine and I on a private table at Breadstix, dressed to the nines, all the boys from Glee Club suddenly showing up and singing for us, and Blaine's look of bashful surprise. In my head it was amazing. All it needed was some careful and precise planning... and the right song.

"What song should the guys sing though?" I asked the room as a whole.

"_Peacock_ by Katy Perry," Brittany said straight away.

We laughed, even though I'm pretty sure she was being serious.

"How about _Bella Notte_ from Lady and the Tramp," Tina said. "It'll be even more appropriate if you guys are actually eating spaghetti and meatballs."

"Wanky," Santana snorted to herself.

Rachel suddenly gasped and turned around, beaming at me.

"I just thought of exactly the right song," she said excitedly. "Blaine will just love it, I'm sure of it; _Perfect._ You know, the Pink song? On the 'What Song Inspires You Most?' question on his Glee Club application form he said that it was his all time favourite because it never failed to make him smile, and the lyrics are just right. I mean, we'll have to rearrange it a little bit so it'll go with all the guys' voices, of course..."

"Rachel, that's it," I said, grinning. "_Perfect, _it's... perfect. Blaine will love that!"

I don't think I'd ever been so excited for a date. I spent the next few days planning everything – _everything _had to be just right. All the guys in Glee Club obviously agreed to serenade Blaine, and also to keep it all quiet so Blaine wouldn't find out, because it wasn't like they were going to say no to _me_. We kind of treated it like a Glee Club project. Rachel and I rearranged the song so it would fit the boys' voices, Puck and Sam learnt to play it on guitar, Santana used her contacts and influence at Breadstix to pre-book a table and make sure that none of the staff would be alarmed when people suddenly burst into song, and I'd already planned my outfit – a gorgeous Armani suit in a deep shade of dark indigo which made my eyes pop and that I'd bought ages ago but had never found an excuse to wear.

About the only thing I hadn't done yet was actually ask Blaine out. It sounds crazy, but I was kind of nervous. I mean, what if he said no? What if he'd changed his mind about how he felt about me? What if, after all that shit with Sebastian, he was done with guys altogether? It sounded horribly insecure, especially coming from me, but I was still plagued with nerves. Eventually I cornered him after Glee rehearsal in the empty choir room. His face immediately went pink, and I desperately suppressed a blush myself.

"Blaine, I need to ask you something," I said.

"Oh... okay," he said quietly. "What is it?"

"Well," I began. "As I'm sure you remember, our first and only date didn't go as well as it could have, and I blame myself entirely for that. But I want to make it up to you. I want to show you how sorry am I about everything that's happened between us and... and how much you mean to me."

Blaine blushed even harder. I took a deep breath, butterflies swarming in my stomach.

"So," I said. "Blaine Anderson, would you do me the honour of going to dinner with me at Breadstix this Friday night, for a first date do-over?"

His face was bright red now, his startling hazel eyes as wide as saucers. Then, after what felt like forever, his nodded.

"I'd love to," he said, grinning shyly.

I grinned back at him, actively stopping myself from cheering out loud. I kind of explosion seemed to be taking place inside my head though.

"Great," I said. "Excellent. I'll pick you up a 7.30 precisely. Dinner will be my treat and formal attire compulsory."

Friday night arrived and I was positively drunk with nerves. There was annoying little voice in my head – which, alarmingly, kind of sounded like Sebastian – that kept on insisting that it was all going to go horribly wrong somehow. School couldn't end fast enough, I checked myself in the mirror constantly as I got ready to make sure I looked immaculate, and my hands couldn't stop shaking as I drove to Blaine's house. Blaine lived all the way in Westerville (he'd given me his address), so I had a long journey in which to silently panic and try to ignore that damn voice in my head.

Finally I got to his house, and when he answered the door I felt my stomach do an embarrassing little swoop. Blaine looked so handsome and dapper and... _wow._ He was wearing a simple black suit with a thin black tie – his ankles weren't even on show and he'd actually eased up a little on the hair gel – and he looked absolutely perfect. His eyes lit up when he saw me.

"Wow, you look amazing, Kurt," he said, awestruck.

I resisted the urge to say that I knew how good I looked, and instead said "Thanks, so do you."

From behind my back I produced a small bouquet of red and yellow roses, and Blaine immediately blushed.

"You actually got me flowers?" he said as he took them.

"Of course I did," I said with a shrug.

Blaine smiled to himself as we drove to Breadstix, smelling his roses every once and a while until we got to the restaurant. Once we got there a waitress showed us to our table, a booth in a relatively quiet and tastefully lit corner. As was planned, it was laid out much more beautifully than the tables surrounding it, with fresh flowers to match the ones I've given Blaine earlier.

"Did you do all this?" Blaine asked as the waitress lit some candles for us.

I just smiled innocently at him as an ice bucket with a bottle of sparkling cider was brought to our table. When we looked through the menu Blaine was trying to be his usual polite self by ordering nothing too expensive, since I was the one paying.

"Don't be ridiculous, Blaine," I said. "Order whatever you want."

"Are you sure?" he said anxiously. "I mean, I don't want to put you out or anything..."

"Money is no object tonight," I insisted. "And before you ask, yes, I am also buying you dessert."

The waitress took our order and poured our drinks for us. Blaine still seemed a little jittery.

"Is something wrong?" I asked gently.

He shook his head. "No, of course not, it's just... after everything that happened before, with you and me and... and _Sebastian_," He frowned to himself a little bit. "I just can't quite believe that after all that we're actually here, on a date."

"Forget about that past," I said, taking his hand from across the table. "I know there's been a lot of unpleasantness, the vast majority of which was my fault, but now's our chance to start afresh. I'm not going to do anything to mess this up again, Blaine."

I felt him squeeze my hand, his cheeks going rosy as he smiled timidly.

"This is so weird," he chuckled. "It seems like just yesterday that I was the dorky new kid you were saving from the dumpster. Through all of this, Kurt, I've never actually stopped liking you. Even when I was trying to hate you, I just couldn't stop. I feel so lucky right now."

"I'm the lucky one," I said, my stomach swooping all over the place. "I thought I'd ruined this completely by treating you like I've treated every other guy, but you're not like other guys. I wish I'd realised it sooner, it probably would've saved us a lot of trouble. I really like you, Blaine. And, if you'll let me, I'd really like to... be your boyfriend."

It was the first time I'd ever said that out loud, not just to Blaine but to any guy at all. I was blushing almost as hard as he was. He squeezed my hand again, before lifting it and pressing his lips to the back of it.

"It would be an honour to have the great Kurt Hummel as my boyfriend," he said, grinning from ear to ear.

Just then our food arrived, and I was pretty much screaming internally as I tried to eat. Blaine actually wanted to be my boyfriend! I never thought I'd see the day when _I _would be so happy to be in a steady relationship, but I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. Once our desserts arrived, right on schedule, the finale of the first date do-over showed up. Blaine's back was to the door, so he didn't notice Artie, Puck, Sam, Finn and Mike moving towards our table. They had all dressed up as smart as possible, so they sort of looked like they were going to Prom.

"Right on time, guys," I said happily.

Blaine turned and was taken aback by the sudden arrival of all the boys from Glee Club, two of whom were holding guitars. "What – what are you guys doing here?"

Instead of answering, Sam and Puck began to play and they all started singing.

"_Made a wrong turn once or twice, dug my way out blood and fire..."_

Blaine was blushing violently, beaming at the singing boys and then at me. Everyone in the restaurant was staring and nodding along to the music, and the boys were putting on a very good show.

"_Pretty, pretty please if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing, you are perfect to me..." _

When they finished the whole room applauded and they took a bow. Blaine had his hands over his mouth, but I could tell from his eyes that he was smiling. He sort of looked like he was about to cry.

"Thank you, boys," I said. "That was lovely. You can go away now."

They left, getting a few appreciative looks from the waitresses. Blaine had finally taken his hands away from his face, revealing the biggest, dorkiest and most adorable smile I'd ever seen.

"I can't believe you did that, Kurt," he said, blushing like crazy. "That was so... so _romantic._ I feel like I'm in a movie or something."

I just shrugged. "It was nothing."

After dinner we walked back to my car, Blaine holding onto his bunch of flowers like they were the most precious thing he'd ever been given. As I reached for the passenger door to let him in he suddenly stopped me, holding onto my hand and turning me to face him. He pulled me closer and kissed me, wrapping his arms around my neck. I never thought I'd ever say this, at least not while still in high school, but I could have happily kissed no one else but Blaine until the end of time.

"Thank you for tonight, Kurt," he said once we separated. "It's been magical."

"Thank you for actually wanting to be my boyfriend," I said.

"Well, it's not like anyone could ever say no to you," he said, with a jarringly sexy smirk.

I laughed, before smirking right back at him. "Well yes, that's very true. You're only human."

We kissed before we got into the car, and kissed for a while in the car before we drove off, and then kissed again at his doorstep, but that was it. We were going to take things slow, glacial even. I didn't want anything to mess this up.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed the fluff, Humble Readers.<br>I'll try and write the very last chapter as quickly as I possibly can.

xxx


	12. Chapter 12

The final chapter is here and, praise Grilled Cheesus, it's actually smutty! *parties hard*

Thanks for sticking with this fic, guys. But, to be honest, I'm glad I'm finally finished. I've got a bunch of other fics that I started before this one and sort of abandoned, so I'm going to be a good Smut Queen and get on with them.

Anyway, some final reviews would be just peachy, so hit that review button, Humble Readers. Go on, hit it. It loves it, the filthy slag.

And I do not and probably never will own Glee.

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><p><strong>Nobody Says No To Kurt Hummel Part Twelve <strong>

"Greetings, McKinley High, this is your beloved senior class president, Kurt Hummel, wishing you a satisfactory Monday morning. Here's what's new. Once again our guidance counsellor, Ms Pilsbury, urges you all to join the Celibacy Club, which is in dire need of members. _Whether you're a virgin looking to hold on to your innocence, need to make up for a few years of sordid wrongdoings, or just looking for a break from sexual activity, the Celibacy Club is the place for you!_ Ms Pilsbury's words, not mine. An immaculate sign-up sheet is on your nearest notice board, but I've been told to inform you all that you should wash your hands before signing it.

"In more important news, a big congrats goes out to me and my two time National Show Choir Championship winning Glee Club, the New Directions, for our outstanding triumph at Saturday's Regionals competition, where we slaughtered the admirable Dalton Academy Warblers and the not at all stupidly named Aural Intensity. And a special shout-out to my wonderful boyfriend, Blaine Anderson, for his particularly incredible solo which, if the swooning girls in the front row were anything to go by, definitely gave us the edge. Bravo, baby. I think it's time to start making some more room in that trophy cabinet because I smell another first place at Nationals. And to celebrate our success myself and the Glee Club will be putting on a little show in the auditorium at the end of the day which all our welcome to.

"And finally, the senior Prom is edging every closer, Titans, and it's time to start voting for your 2012 Prom King and Queen. Or, in the case of myself and my lovely boyfriend and running mate, Blaine Anderson, Prom King and _King_. So get voting, guys. The polls don't close until Prom night itself and, not to be terribly biased or anything, but I would look all kinds of awesome in crown. This is your senior class president, Kurt Hummel, signing out and wishing you a relatively pleasant Monday."

It had been months since our first date do-over, and my relationship with Blaine was better than I ever could have imagined. It was probably the longest I'd ever been with the same person and I used to think that nothing could be more depressing, but I'd never been happier. At first Blaine became popular just by association. Everyone saw him with me and knew that he couldn't be messed with – only Santana was allowed to say anything rude to him because that's just how she spoke to everyone. But soon he didn't need to be by my side to be popular.

Rachel gave up one of her numerous solos so he could sing at Sectionals and it had gone down a storm. And then he'd gotten the lead in the school musical, where he finally got to be the Tony to Rachel's Maria, and tickets had sold out every night. He soon became well known as one of the most talented members of the Glee Club, up there with me, Rachel and Mercedes. Blaine's dorky dress sense even started a bit of a trend among the guys in school, especially the freshman. It soon became impossible to walk down the hall without spotting bowties, Capri pants and exposed ankles, and the boys locker room now smelt strongly or hair gel as well as cheap body spray and crotch sweat. Blaine and I were the new power couple of McKinley High and we were a shoe-in to become the school's first ever Prom King and King.

But it wasn't just about the popularity. No really, it wasn't. I was happier than ever because I finally had the boyfriend I'd always wanted – someone to walk down the hall with hand in hand, someone I had everything in common with, and someone who loved me not just because I was Head Cheerio, senior class president and a show choir star, but just because I was _me_.

And before you ask, yes, I did love him too. I loved him more than all the clothes in my closet and every trophy I'd ever won combined. No matter how many guys checked me out as I walked down the hall in my Cheerios uniform, no matter how many times Puckerman gave me the eye during Glee Club, and no matter how often Karofsky and Azimio flirted with me as I yelled at them for tossing nerds into the dumpster, Blaine was the only guy for me. He was the only person I wanted to be with and I wasn't going to let anything mess us up. I mean, I didn't blame all those guys for still wanting me even though I was now completely unobtainable – if anything, being so unobtainable just made them all want me more. They were only human and if I was them I'd want to fuck me too. But I was happily spoken for, thank you very much. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

That weekend Blaine's parents were once again out of town – they hardly ever seemed to be home – so we were making out on his bed without any fear of interruption. He really was the most amazing kisser on the planet, but kissing was about all we'd done. I wasn't complaining or anything. I didn't want to do anything to make Blaine uncomfortable, no matter how often I just wanted to rip off his dorky outfit and ravish him. And, as Blaine himself had said when I pointed this out (and I couldn't believe my ears when he did), that's why they invented masturbation. But tonight's make out session went above and beyond the usual. He was on top of me, grinding against my thigh, kissing me harder than ever and actually _moaning_ into my mouth. I was so turned on I could've died.

"Kurt," he sighed against my lips. "I... I love you... so much..."

"Mmmm, I love you too..." I murmured back, running my fingers through his thankfully gel-less hair.

He kissed his way down my jaw, nuzzling my neck and sucking on the sensitive skin just below my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. He was such a fast learner when it came to what made me moan.

"Kurt," he said again, kissing and sucking my neck. "I'm ready."

His mouth on my skin felt so good that it took me a second to realise what he'd said. "Huh?"

"I'm ready," he whispered in my ear. "I want you, Kurt. I want us to... go all the way."

I sat up, pushing him back a little and looking right into his eyes.

"Are – are you sure?" I asked nervously.

"Definitely," he said, nodding. His eyes were dark with lust, the pupils so dilated that I could barely see the startling hazel.

A small voice in my head said '_Finally...' _but it was completely drowned out by another voice, a much loudly one that was currently screaming and sobbing with joy. Blaine had wanted his first time to be special and meaningful, he'd wanted it to be with the guy he was completely in love with and trusted. And _I _was that guy. For the first time in my entire life I was so happy that I actually wanted to cry. I cupped Blaine's face in my hands and planted a soft kiss on his lips.

"I'm going to make this perfect for you, baby," I said.

He grinned adorably, before our lips met again and he moved us so I was on top of him, nestled between his legs. Our making our with deep and sensual, our tongues exploring each other's mouths as he held me close and I caressed his thighs. Our hips moved at the same time, almost unconsciously, and when the bulges in our jeans rubbed together we both groaned into each other's mouths. Our lips finally separated so I could pull his t-shirt over his head, revealing a toned, slim and slightly hairy body underneath. Blaine started undoing the buttons of my shirt, his fingers fumbling so much that I had to help him out in the end, and his let out a gasp as his eyes raked over my smooth, pale chest.

"You're beautiful, Kurt," he said in awe, running his hands tentatively over my arms.

I was used to only being called 'hot' in these kinds of situations. Being seen as beautiful was still wonderfully unusual, and was made all the more amazing by the way it sounded coming from Blaine. I laid him back down on the bed, kissing his jaw and his neck, sucking on his earlobe and licking his Adam's apple, before moving down to his collarbone. I made my way down his chest, kissing and biting and licking and tasting, feeling his thumping heartbeat, his deep moans making me shiver. When I caught one of his small nipples in my mouth, sucking on it gently, he cried out and arched his back, throwing his head back against the pillow. So apparently my baby had very sensitive nipples... _fantastic_. I licked, sucked and nibbled on them, moving from one to the other as Blaine made some of the sexiest noises I had ever heard; deep growls and high whimpers that would put a porn star to shame.

"Oh God, Kurt... ahh... that's – that's so... ohhh... so amazing... oh my God... oh my fucking God..."

He whined in disappointment when my mouth moved away from his now very hard nipples, but I just had to taste the rest of him. I kissed my way down his stomach, grazing my teeth against the gorgeous 'V' of his hips, savouring his salty sweat, until I reached the waistband of his jeans. He looked down at me with nervous excitement, as I undid his pants, pulling them off with his underwear in one go.

"Wow," I said with a smirk, looking down at his thick, leaking cock. My baby was _impressive._

Blaine grinning, his face bright red, and watched in awe as I took off my own jeans and underwear. He let out a little gasp as he looked at my body and I tried not to feel too smug about it. He pulled me down on top of him again, kissing me sensually and wrapping his legs around my hips, the both of us letting out a moan as our erections rubbed together. We rutted and kissed for a while until our lips finally separated, both of us breathless and sweaty.

"So how do you want to do this?" I whispered.

"Like... like this," Blaine said timidly, his thighs tightening around my waist a little bit.

"You mean you want to bottom?" I asked. "Are you sure?"

He nodded with a bashful little smile. "Yeah, I'm sure. Whenever I've imagined being intimate for the first time it's been just like this. You don't mind, do you?"

"No, not at all," I said, maybe a little too quickly. "It's just... I've never actually been on top before. Nobody's ever wanted me like that. It's like my first time all over again."

"How?" he said, stroking the hair on the nape of my neck.

"It's my first time not being on the bottom," I said quietly. "My first time having sex that's actually meaningful and with someone I really care about. My first time making love... as opposed to just fucking."

Blaine smiled, stroking my cheek, and lifted his head to kiss me.

"It's an honour to be your first, sweetheart," he said softly.

"I'll be gentle with you," I chuckled, kissing him again.

I was pleasantly surprised to find some condoms and a bottle of lubricant in Blaine's bedside cabinet. Apparently he was so sure that he was ready to lose his virginity that he'd been stocked up for a while. I slicked up my fingers with some lube, Blaine spreading his legs for me in anticipation, and I gently teased his hole with the tip of my finger, covering it in the cool liquid. He hissed as I pushed one finger slowly inside him, clinging onto my arms and biting his bottom lip.

"Am I hurting you?" I asked anxiously.

"A little," he said shakily, shutting his eyes. "But don't... don't stop..."

I kissed his neck as I twisted my finger, pushing it in and out of his incredibly tight hole until his muscles relaxed enough for me to add a second finger inside him. Blaine trembled under me as I scissored my fingers to stretch him out, still hissing in pain but pushing down onto my hand at the same time. I thrust my fingers faster and deeper, wanting him to be as prepared as possible. He cried out and clenched around my fingers once I touched his prostate, moaning my name when I added a third finger and stretched him out even more.

"You should see yourself, baby," I whispered as I fingered him. "You look so gorgeous like this, all breathless and sweaty and falling apart. Are you ready for me, love?"

Blaine seemed beyond words and just nodded, whimpering in disappointment when I removed my fingers. I grabbed a condom and rolled it onto my throbbing erection. Seeing Blaine so completely turned on had made me rock hard, and just slicking myself up with some more lube made me moan a little. I positioned myself between Blaine's legs, catching his lips in a hard kiss as I very slowly pushed my cock into his opening. His whimpered into my mouth, holding me tighter, and I stopped every now and again to give him time to get used to the intrusion. Finally I was all the way inside him, squeezed so wonderfully tight that I had to bury my face in his neck for a second just to catch my breath. I easily could have come straight away, but I definitely wasn't going to let that happen.

"Kurt," Blaine said breathlessly. "Are... are you okay?"

"I was about to ask you that," I chuckled into his neck. "I just... I need a minute... holy shit, you feel so good, Blaine..."

"Mmm, so do you," he sighed, wrapping his legs around my hips again.

We held each other for a while until I finally calmed down enough to start moving. I pulled almost all the way out and thrust back into him, slow and cautious because I really didn't want to hurt him. As we continued to move like this, slow and steady, Blaine raked his fingers through my hair, pulling my head out of his neck so we could kiss in the same slow and sensual way that our love-making was going. It felt unbelievable. It was like time was standing still, like me and Blaine were the only two people in the world. So _this_ was what I was missing back in my meaningless conquest days...

One perfectly angled thrust made me hit his prostate and he cried out, moaning my name and bucking his hips forward quicker.

"Oh my God, Kurt, more... so good... ahhh... don't stop... more... ohhh... more..."

I hooked my arm around one of his legs, lifting it so it was over my shoulder, and thrust into him harder and faster. His fingernails dragged down my arms as his moans and cries became louder and louder. I knew that I was close to the edge. I felt so incredible and I could feel that tidal wave about to crash over me, but I wanted him to come first. I wrapped my hand around his leaking cock, spreading his hot pre-come around his crown with my thumb and stroking him in time with my hard thrusts. Blaine was completely falling apart, losing himself in the pleasure. It was beautiful to watch.

"Oh Kurt... oh God, Kurt... don't stop... I'm so, so close... _oh fuck, _don't stop!"

"Come for me, Blaine... mmm... come for me, baby..."

Blaine threw his head back, clinging onto the headboard with all his might as he finally erupted all over my hand and his stomach, screaming my name. He was bucking erratically against me, his ass clenching tight around my cock, and that was all it took for my orgasm to hit me, and it hit like ton of bricks. I thrust messily into him, coming so hard that I was seeing stars, so hard that I was pretty sure that my heart actually stopped at one point, until I eventually collapsed on top of him, completely spent.

With what little energy we had, we cleaned ourselves up and covered ourselves in the duvet, holding each other in the afterglow. I had never seen Blaine look so perfectly happy; his skin still glowing with sweat, his dark curls damp and loose, and the most blissful smile on his face as he looked at me with those startling hazel eyes. He was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I'd also never noticed just how pretty his eyelashes were, but I decided against saying that out loud. It sounded creepy enough in my head. We wrapped our arms around each other, his head nestled in the crook of my neck – we fit together like a jigsaw.

"I've never been one for snuggling afterwards," I said, stroking his hair. "But this is nice."

I felt him sigh against me. "Yeah, it is."

"So how do you feel, love?" I asked gently.

"Sore," he chuckled. "But mainly... _wonderful_. It was just what I wanted for my first time."

I smiled and kissed the top of his head. "Good. It was just what I wanted for you too, Blaine. I didn't want you to have any regrets."

"I couldn't possibly regret this, Kurt," he said, raising his head to look at me.

I smiled, stroking his cheek and just looking at him. How the hell did I get so lucky?

"And anyway," he said, suddenly arching an eyebrow. "It's not like you could've said no to _me_."

"Oh, of course not," I said with a smirk. "Nobody says no to Blaine Anderson."

"Damn straight," he said, before we both burst out laughing.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed not just this chapter, but the fic as a whole, Humble Readers.<p>

Chuck some reviews at me.

xxx


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